"Fear the Lord your God, walk in all His ways, love Him and serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul.”
Been lacking in this reverent fear for God. You know you need to check yourself when you know how mighty and great your God is but you choose to distribute that glory to yourself instead of to Him. Pause. Re-do. & Hold fast onto Him.
Waking up thinking all you need to do is spit out mucus but ending up throwing up is pretty gross. But then, you didn’t eat anything so all that comes up was your cough syrup & your insides are all sore & empty….
haha I laugh at myself because I give myself pep talks. "Fight, body, fight! You can do it, kill this virus!"
This really sucks. But I appreciate your prayers :)
Shout out of thanks to my wonderful bestfriend/boyfriend.
He basically opened his home into a place where I can rest & be taken care of. He doesn’t want me to be home, suffering alone so the minute he gets out of class, he makes me knock out from the medication on his bed with like three blankets to keep me cozied up and warm while he cooks me chicken noodle soup. He continually checks my temperature & puts a cold towel on my head to keep my fever down. He makes me tea, reminding me to take my medicine & continue taking cough drops. He rubs my back & gives me kisses on the forehead as I cough up a storm. He has midterms next week and is catching up on his lectures but lets me be lazy and rest next to him while he studies and checks to make sure I’m okay like every 10 min.
He serves me & prays for me & makes me laugh. He continues to love me without expecting anything in return. I’m sorry for being all mushy gushy corny status but he’s so wonderful & my heart is so filled with thankfulness for him.
I appreciate & adore you soooo much. Thank you thank you thank you.
"I want to be a woman who lives totally abandoned to the first commandment: to love my Lord, my God, with all my heart. I don’t want the reputation that I love God, I don’t want to write songs about loving God, I don’t want to talk about loving God. I want to actually love God. When I close my eyes, I want my heart to move. When I close my eyes and I look at Him, I want to feel alive on the inside. I want to look at Him with a fire in my heart and it’s real."
Soooo, the results of today’s hospital trip: - I have swollen lymph nodes - I have pharyngitis… which scared me & then I looked it up when I got home & it’s just like another word for a really bad sore throat. - I got tested for mono cuz the doctor wanted to make sure but as I predicted: negative. - I got tested for strep throat and I’ll find out tomorrow. -To add onto all this, I should be getting my period sometime this week.
I have three different medications that I’m on. & I’m required to stay in bed for three days.
At least good news is tomorrow’s class is cancelled & what a perfect time for my school I teach at, to be on fall break. Thank da Lawd.
I will be looking like a hot mess. I will be gross & virus-y & coughing. I will be weak & knocked out on medications most of the time. But hopefully I’ll be better and back to normal in 3 days.
WHEE. let’s catch up on all the sleep I missed so far this semester :)
I’ll be okayyyyyyyyyyyy. Keep praying though, please! <3
I love it when I leave the school & the janitor always tells me “God bless you!” & I love that my cooperating teacher is Christian & we get to talk about God in little ways here & there! & I love that we found out that Larry’s grandma is Christian! :)
& last week, for the first time I felt like everything I planned for the class that day went perfectly. I got written up a good observation & all my kids were on green for the first time!!! I was sooo proud of them <3 I’m gonna miss those little monsters!
& I lovedddd the worship at the worship conference. The sessions were okay but Sarah reeves did an amazing job leading worship and focusing on the Holy Spirit’s presence in that room. There’s something about instruments playing the right keys that somehow softly pull on our heartstrings & being overwhlemed & broken down by the reminders of God’s love for us.
I’m sick, I sound like a frog & my throat is throbbing but hey, I’m forced to rest & I have Dad who is my Healer & Provider. i’ll be okay. God is goooood :)
You know me in and out and lovely are your thoughts about me. How great is mercy. You chose me though I am unworthy. All that is within me - cries you are holy.
Even when I’m walking through the valley of death. Even when I’m broken and nothing is left - you lead me on… you lead me on So I’ll pour my tears in the ocean. And I’ll leave my pain by the shore. With your mighty wave you’ll sweep them away, till they are no more.
You hide me - in your wings and carry, - all my fears and worries -You lift the lowly. You wrap me in your arms of safety - When the battle’s raging - you’re fighting for me. Even when I’m walking through the valley of death. Even when I’m broken and nothing is left - you lead me on… you lead me on So I’ll pour my tears in the ocean. And I’ll leave my pain by the shore. With your mighty wave you’ll sweep them away, till they are no more.
*There’s freedom from my past - And there’s hope in my future You are my today and you are my forever….. So I’ll pour my tears in the ocean And I’ll leave my pain by the shore. And with a mighty wave, you’ll sweep them away, till they are no more. You’ll sweep them to the ocean floor.